Oh Catastrophe! calamity unbound! Katie Price better known to you and me as Jordan, yes she of the double dimension, has kicked poor oul Peter Andre into the long grass.
"I dont understand it all" says the hapless Pete.
"Was I not a professional male doormat of the highest order?. Did I not worship at the Jordan alter of adoration.. without question? Did I not wander around night and day in resigned good spirits with TV cameras half way up my jaxi!? What more can a fella do!?"
Yes poor oul Pete. Kicked into the long grass. What will he do now...perhaps rekindle that singing career...I hear he was once big in outer Mongolia.
"Yes its a pity Pete" said Jordan
"Its a pity Pete...is that all you can say" exclaims Pete
"Yes its a pity Pete! but the viewing figures have wained
I have to be in the whiteheat kitchen of public perceptance"
"Whaaaa...." said Pete.