Dear Tesco
I went into one of your shops today to look for a light-hearted, funny Xmas card for my ginger friend. Sadly, I was unable to find one on your shelves. I'm sure I saw the one copied below the other day, but am wondering if you've sold them all? My wife told me that you'd banned them following one complaint from one mum who has ginger haired kids. I'm sure she's winding me up, after all how can one mum possibly influence your merchandising policy in such a major way? If I found bananas offensive because they look like yellow penises, would you take them off your shelf? No, exactly.
Anyway I am a bit alarmed that you have reacted so strongly as to remove this card following one politically-motivated complaint from one individual with zero sense of humour. I'm sure it isn't true.
Tesco, if this story is indeed true then you are a traitor to common sense, pandering to the politically correct, imposing censorship on mainstream humour, and redeeming the ever-growing and damaging culture of the "fear of causing offense" in the wake of a harmless gag. If true, you have just further shifted the threshold of what can be regarded as acceptable in humour - the barriers around modern humour are already so oppressive that it's a wonder we have comedians or humourists at all these days.
I am also alarmed that my ginger friend has been excluded from the range of Xmas humour this year, as your decision to ban this card has reinforced the notion that there is something wrong with being ginger rather than allowing it to pass as a bit of harmless, light-hearted humour.
Anyway if you can not sell me one then I will easily be able to get a JPEG of it from the internet. There's one right here....
Sincerely
Rick