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    Howard, thank you for you kind offer of membership of the lodge.

    Unfortunately my lack of belief in any form of Great (or even Lesser) Architect precludes me from taking up your offer.

    You'll just have to find someone else who is willing to pretend to be concerned about the plight of the local estate agent he is stuck next to at dinner.

    I can assure you that the only time I am likely to be seen with a rolled up trouser leg is when I have forgotten my bicycle clips!

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